Before
by Thefaultinourstarfish
Summary: After a traumatizing experience, Cress is paranoid and anxious. Thorne finally realizes his feelings for Cress, but doesn't know how to put those feelings into words. Post-Winter. Slightly AU.
1. Chapter 1

**83 DAYS BEFORE**

Crescent Darnell sat on the Rampion with the rest of the gang. Everything had been solved, and her life had changed so much over the last six months. Half a year ago she had never even seen Earth. Now she was living on Earth. Her current living situation was a little complicated, but no one minded. After going through kidnapping Kai and saving Scarlet and placing Cinder on the throne of Luna and Cinder and Kai getting married and uniting Lunars and Earthens…Things have been crazy. Cinder and Kai had decided to live in New Beijing as they had been before, but in the palace. Thorne didn't want to go back to America, Iko was Cinder's best friend, Wolf didn't want to live on Luna where he was raised to be a killing machine, Scarlet didn't have any family in France anymore, and Cress no longer had her satellite or her father, so everyone was without a place to live.

Cinder and Kai graciously offered to let everyone stay in the palace with them, since they had plenty of space and everyone was in need of a place to stay. It was a little weird at first, but everyone got comfortable rather quickly.

They all were busy most days. Thorne worked with the imperial military, designing new ships and tanks and war machines. Iko assisted Cinder in any way that she could, and also worked with Torin to plan and schedule events for Cinder. Scarlet liked to help out in the kitchen when she could, but she also was in charge of agricultural development and technologies. After spending years on her own farm, she worked to find more efficient ways to farm. Wolf was a Sergeant in the military, and also worked with Thorne occasionally. Jacin Clay and Winter opted to stay on Luna, but they both stayed in contact regularly. Cress got to do what she did best. Hack and code and stare at a screen when she was working. She programmed all of the palace's appliances, set up security measures, updated news feeds, and came up with new applications for the palace portscreens.

Now, sitting inside the Rampion with everyone, she felt kind of sad. Everyone was chatting, eating sandwiches and laughing, talking about new things going on.

"It _was_ you that snuck into my bathroom!" Thorne exclaimed, pointing a finger at Iko. "You stole all of my fancy towels!"

Iko laughed. Meanwhile, Cinder and Kai were discussing upcoming political appearances, and the baby that was on the way. It was a boy, and they were beyond excited. Everyone was elated as well. Cress was going to be a non-biological aunt! It was very exciting.

Scarlet and Wolf had joined the conversation with Thorne and Iko. Cress stood up suddenly and everyone turned to look at her.

"I-I have to use the restroom," she said awkwardly. Everyone went back to their conversations, and she made her way to the lavatory.

She padded down the hall to the bathroom. She went inside and turned on the faucet. She splashed water on her face and took a deep breath. She didn't want to tell them. She _couldn't_ tell them. She took deep breaths again as a knock came from the door.

"Cress?"

Thorne stood outside the bathroom with a concerned look on his face. He had noticed that Cress had seemed a little off today. The crew was spending time together for the first time aside from dinner in quite a while. He didn't want her to miss out and feel upset when she could be having fun with everyone else.

She opened the door slowly. Her hair had grown out from its cropped cut and now reached her shoulders. It was a bit longer, but it curled, so shoulder length was usual for her. Her eyes were strikingly blue after splashing the water on her face. Thorne swallowed, remembering a few nights before when she had came to his room very late at night. Three in the morning late.

He had heard a small and quiet knock at his door. At first he thought it was nothing, someone down the hall or the vents or something. But it continued two more times. Thorne got out of bed, boxers only, and opened up the door to his bedroom.

There she stood, in her light blue camisole and plaid pajama pants, tears streaked down her cheeks. She sniffed and wiped an eye.

"I-I'm sorry-y, Captain…" she sniffed again, her words struggling to get out. "I-I had a nightmare..."

Thorne pulled her into his arms and kissed the top of her head. He used to do it out of convenience when she felt bad, but he knew it made her feel better and he would do anything to make her feel better. He also didn't mind. He really cared about Cress after all they had been through.

"Hey, it's okay." He said, then yawned. He let go of her only to grab her hand and walk with her over to his bed. He climbed up and pulled down the covers, opening his arms. "Come on," he said softly.

Cress shook her head. Thorne frowned. They had had a fallout right after things had been settled with Earth and Luna. She confessed her feelings and Thorne confessed his. They both liked each other, but Cress loved him. Thorne didn't think he was _in love_ and ended up breaking her heart… She distanced herself from him ever since.

Thorne leaned over off of the bed and pulled her back onto it with him. He sat with his legs outstretched and his arms around her. She rested her head on his chest. He put his chin on her head.

"I'm sorry for doing this," Cress whispered, sniffing again. He could tell that she was ashamed and embarrassed.

"Hey," He rubbed her arms. "It's no big deal. Do you want to talk about it?"

Cress shook her head and leaned against him. They sat in silence for a few minutes, and she fell asleep in his arms.

It really got Thorne to thinking about this girl. They had traveled through the desert together, experienced Shell-trafficking first hand, kissed on a rooftop amidst gunfire and a rabid Wolf, and helped save Earth together with their friends. He'd seen every side there was to this girl, and she had gotten to know him very well, too. He did like Cress. He cared for her deeply. Five months ago he didn't think he was in love with her like she was with him, but now he was having different thoughts.

He wasn't the kind of guy to be tied down. He partied and played with the ladies. He toyed with their feelings and never settled. Commitment wasn't his _forte_. But this girl—Cress—was different. He would do anything to make her smile. He loved her voice. She could sing beautifully, and her laugh was absolutely adorable. She was the cutest thing he had ever seen, and their hardships had brought them together. She once said that she thought they were destined to be together; that it was fate. And he wasn't so sure of that then. But now, he wouldn't mind waking up to her next to him every morning.

He eventually fell asleep, his mind made up about how he felt about her. He did love her. But he had never said that to anyone. Ever.

So he decided to keep that information to himself for a while.

Standing in front of her in the Rampion reminded him of how he loved her. He did. But he couldn't tell her. Not now. Maybe not ever.

"Are you okay?" he asked, looking down at her with a frown. She tugged at a piece of her hair.

"Fine." She muttered, looking at the floor. She started to move around him. "We should get back to the others—"

"Cress?"

She stopped and looked at him.

"Captain?"

He was going to do it. Tell her! It was important that she knew, right? She deserved to know. He had kept this inside for _days_ and let her feel uncomfortable about coming to his room so late at night after he basically crushed her heart. She needed to know!

"Uh," he rubbed the back of his neck. "well…" He ran a hand through his hair and then sighed.

"I need help with my portscreen," he said, getting it out of his pocket. "I've been having some trouble registering for some dating sites…"

* * *

 **A/N: YAY FIRST CHAPTER! OKAY. SO. This is post-winter. It will mainly be Cress and Thorne but of course the others will always be there! I'm toying with ideas of how this story will unfold, but I hope you liked the first chapter! Review, my lovelies!**


	2. Chapter 2

**83 DAYS BEFORE (continued)**

" _Uh," he rubbed the back of his neck. "well…" He ran a hand through his hair and then sighed._

" _I need help with my portscreen," he said, getting it out of his pocket. "I've been having some trouble registering for some dating sites…"_

Cress blinked and then faked a smile. "Of course."

Thorne showed her the issue, and she had it fixed within a minute. She handed it back to him and flashed a sad smiled. "All done."

Thorne frowned and grabbed her arm as she was about to leave again. "Talk to me."

Cress looked at him, grabbing his hand and moving it off of her arm. "I'm fine."

"I know something's wrong," Thorne stepped closer to her and sighed. "Cress, please let me help."

She looked away from him and down at the floor. _My shoes look rather nice today I never noticed how small my feet are wow is it hot in here or is it just him? It's definitely him_

"Um," her head snapped up. "I'm okay, really." She smiled, big and cheery. She laughed, but it wasn't sincere. "Just feminine stuff."

"Oh." Thorne blushed _Thorne blushed_ and he scratched at the back of his neck. "Well, uh," he sucked in a quick breath. "Do you need anything? Or something? Um…" He cleared his throat and stretched at his collar, the blush still prominent on his face. "Is it hot in here or is it just me?"

"It's just you," she whispered.

Silence.

They both stood there, silently, looking at each other. The silence wasn't uncomfortable, but it wasn't exactly peaceful, either.

"We should get back," Thorne said, taking her hand. Cress didn't protest this time, and he led her back to the cargo bay where everyone else was still eating and chatting.

"Cress!" Iko exclaimed. "I forgot to ask, but how was your trip back to Farafrah?"

Cress blanched.

She had gone back to Farafrah to try to learn more about her father. He had been trying to find her there, and he had been successful in doing so. She went back to his hotel room to try and find something of his that she could keep; hold on to. She had spent her whole life away from him, and had only found out that he was her father before he died. It was tragic, and Cress was still very shaken up about it.

She hadn't found anything from her father's in Farafrah.

"Oh," Cress smiled. "It was nice. Nothing of 's—err, my dad's stuff was still in the hotel room, sadly."

"Aww," Iko frowned. "I'm so sorry." Cress shrugged.

"It's all right. It was nice to at least meet him."

The conversation drifted off. Thorne took a seat next to Cress and took a hold of her hand. Cress was anxious but squeezed his hand, listening as Cinder and Kai spoke.

"Axel?" Kai asked. Cinder shrugged.

"Eh. Carter?" Kai scrunched up his face.

"Maybe."

They went back and forth with baby names for a while. Eventually, everyone decided to retire back to their rooms aboard the Rampion. Thorne followed Cress when she made her exit.

"Cress?"

His voice was soft and gentle, which made Cress's heart melt. She turned to look at him. He followed her around much more than usual. He was always coming to talk to her. Was this an important thing to be realizing?

"What is it, Captain?" Cress smiled at him, a single dimple appearing on her left cheek. Thorne grinned at her. He opened the door to his room and winked at her.

"Will you come talk to me for a bit?" he asked, eyeing her carefully. He was taking note of her body language, trying to decipher what exactly had been going on with her today. He wondered if it was his fault, and felt a twang of guilt in the pit of his stomach. He wouldn't be able to live with himself if he had put her in this strange and upsetting mood. He just wanted to cheer her up in whatever way he could.

Cress looked hesitant, but after seeing the pouty look on his face, she rolled her eyes and nodded.

"You are such a child, Thorne." She smiled though as she walked into the room.

They both took a seat on the bed, sitting cross-legged across from each other. Cress held her hands in her lap, looking around quietly. Thorne watched her silently.

Thorne grinned mischievously, looking at her, slowing coming closer to her on the bed. He was going to cheer her up and he was going to do a damned well job at it. He snaked closer to her on the bed, and she raised her eyebrows, a small smile coming to her lips.

"Captain?"

He suddenly lunged at her, tickling her sides as quickly as he could, and she burst out into uncontainable laughter, tears forming in her eyes.

"THORNE!"

She was panting and rolling around, trying to get him to stop in any way that she could, but he held her in a firm grip. He tickled her and tickled her, her laughter so contagious that Thorne had tears on his face from laughing so hard.

After a few minutes he grew tired and plopped himself down next to her, grinning.

Cress slowed her breathing and then punched him in the arm, laughing. "You jerk!"

"Wow, you called me a _jerk_! That's the most insulting thing you have ever said to me!" He grinned, teasing her. That was truly what he did best.

Cress rolled her eyes but smiled. Thorne smiled right back at her.

"So, what really happened in Farafrah?"

Cress paled. "What?"

"You were gone for three days and you didn't spend all three of those days searching your dad's old room. You've been acting way out of it these last few days, and I suspect that it has to do with your trip. So spill it, Blondie." Thorne rested his chin in his hands, watching her closely and ready to listen intently.

"Thorne…" Cress trailed off, blushing. She looked at her hands again, a frown appearing on her face. "I don't know if I'm ready to talk about it," she whispered, her voice cracking. Thorne noticed that she was becoming increasingly emotional and he regretted bringing it up. He wanted to know what had happened and what was wrong, but he didn't want to upset her in any way. That was the completr opposite of what he wanted.

"You don't have to talk about it now," he said softly, touching her hair. He smoothed it down. "I'm ready when you are. I'll wait until you feel comfortable enough, okay?"

Cress nodded, sniffing. She sighed, looking up at him. Her eyes made his heart melt every time she gave him that look. "Thank you, Captain."

"You're so welcome, Crescent." This made her smile.

"When did you start calling me that?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. Thorne grinned, taking her hand and holding it in his.

"I'm trying a few new things. Testing things out," he winked at her, which made her blush.

"Testing things out?"

"Just in case."

* * *

 **A/N: OKAY I had a hard time figuring out where I wanted to go with this chapter, but it is finished! Yay! Tell me what you thought! What happened in Farafrah? When do you think Thorne will tell Cress how he feels? HOW will he tell her? What should Cinder and Kai name their baby? Thank you all so much for the reviews thus far! I'm glad you're liking the story!**

 **Until next time! Review, my lovelies!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: AHHHH! LOOK! I'M BACKKK! I just finished Winter about an hour ago and my love for the lunar chronicles resurfaced and since I'm on Christmas Break right now, I'll probably be cranking out several one-shots and a few chapters to this lovely story ;) YAY LOOK I DIDN'T ABANDON YOU! SO I didn't know for sure where I wanted to head with this story and now that I've finished Winter, I have a much better idea of what I am doing, so I hope you all enjoy and don't have me for being gone for so long, I've had a lot going on, but I can't stay away from writing forever :***

 **I do not own the Lunar Chronicles and I apologize for any blips in here, I'm adding on to a story I started writing 6 months ago ;)**

* * *

 **108 DAYS BEFORE**

Cress was an actress.

Today, she was brave. She was a police officer on a net drama, handcuffs on her belt, a gun in her hands, ready to bust down the door and search the suspect's home. She took deep breaths and she studied her surroundings, making sure the coast was clear before she entered the hotel room that once belonged to the father she didn't know she had until it was too late.

Cress was adjusting her imaginative police hat when she heard a voice.

" _A shell."_

It was just a whisper of a voice, barely even audible. But she could hear the desire in that voice, and it chilled her to the bone. A shiver went down her spine, and her fearless facade had fizzled out, leaving a shaken, scared Cress.

"Is someone there?"

Her voice shook as she let go of the doorknob, turning towards the sound. The hallway of the hotel was silent, save for the wind blowing the few grains of sand around on the floor that had followed her from outside.

There was no way they could still be traficking shells here, right? was dead, and he was the one who was trying to find the shells, trying to find her, when he had been in Africa. Why would anyone else want a shell, if they could just have a human?

She couldn't help but feel nervous returning here, after everything that had happened a few months ago. It was different being here now, no one to guide her or protect her. Would it have been better if someone had come with her? When she was taken by the shell-traficking caravaners, Thorne hadn't even been able to save her. He was blind then, but regardless of that, she needed to do this alone. She needed to be heroic and brave and courageous.

Just a hotel room. Just an empty hotel room. No one was coming for her. No one was against her anymore.

It was going to be okay.

She let her imagination return, her cotton tank top and shorts becoming a law enforcement uniform once again, her breathing slowing as she turned the knob and stepped into the room, shutting the creaky door behind her.

And it was completely empty.

Barren, nothing but the white, stained curtains with holes in them, draping down from the sad excuse for a window. The wind rustled them up and Cress listened to the whiny gale, the only noise she could hear in this quiet, empty room. A sigh escaped her. She'd been in Farafrah for less than an hour and her luck had already run dry.

Cress shut her eyes and took a deep breath before she turned and opened the door again, disappointment flooding into her. She had taken one step out into the hallway when she felt a sting on her arm. Confused, she furrowed her brow and looked at her shoulder, where a dart was protruding. She didn't even have time to react before the sleepiness hit her in a wave, causing her knees to buckle under her weight. Her head knocked into the wall, a picture frame falling and breaking as she crashed to the ground, bits of glass spraying into her hair as the two fell in synchronization.

"This time, we'll get our money's worth," she heard a deep voice say, just before she had blacked out.

When Cress awoke, she was lying in the middle of the street, next to a garbage can and a run down building, a bar. It was pitch black outside, and the time seemed to be very late into the night, probably 3 or 4 in the morning, from what she could remember from her nights walking the dunes. She still felt disoriented, very unsure of how she had gotten there, what had happened back at the hotel, and where she even was. The sand that had blown all over her clothes suggested she was still in the desert, hopefully still in Farafrah, but how was she to know?

She lifted herself into a sitting position, finding her back and limbs to be achingly sore, from what she didn't know. Her head pounded and she crinkled her nose, finally getting a good whiff of the trash behind her, wanting to gag. She inspected herself, taking note of the holes now in her shorts, and the stain that was now on her tank top. Her hair was matted and in clumps, sticking out in all directions. The confusion had finally stopped and the panic set in, crawling all over her skin, giving her goosebumps and springing tears to her eyes.

She reached for her port which she had tucked into her waistband, and was surprised to find it in tact and unharmed. She stood up hesitantly, her bones protesting, and she called for a taxi to take her to the nearest airport, which was a several hours drive away in Cairo.

As she sat in the back of the cab and thought and thought and tried to remember the hours before, her mind was empty and blanked. Had she been drugged? Her kidnapper had used a tranquilizing dart to take her, but surely it wouldn't have knocked her out for 14 hours. When had she woken up? Why couldn't she remember?

All she knew was that something bad had happened. And it was eerily disturbing that she had no idea what that bad thing was.

* * *

 **A/N: OOOOOO FLASHBACK CHAPTERRRRR**

 **what do you guys think happened? Sorry if this just confused you more, but you'll all just have to wait and see ;)))))**

 **review, my lovelies! I hope you enjoyed :)**


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